Our client Margaret followed our recommendation and suffered a Kreml-related accident.
Margaret says, “I was standing under my rain shower head cascade of KREML most of the day, and then slipped in the tub and am at the ER. Did you know that they treat acute friction & bad sprains with medical grade KREML?”
Margaret is recuperating at Hair 911.
Get well soon, Margaret.
HHoF Stylists, Managers and Gum Popping Receptionist, especially Mistress MJ, truly beyond touched! Am still tender and throbbing, & Dr. McNasty insists on daily KREML massages followed by healthy slurping of liquids. Visiting hours are between 11:00 AM and 11:09 AM, and stickily welcome your presence at the foot of my bed, but be careful, there are pools of KREML oozing out of my IV, so wear your salon rubbers. Coke machines were replaced by KREML dispensers, so grab a bottle on the way in. Donna maintains that KREML is a powerful antioxidant, and judging by my bedpan I'd say that is the case. Please note: Cameras are not permitted underneath my covers.
ReplyDeleteI recommend a bracing salt water enema - Norma Desmond's perfect cure all!
ReplyDeleteIsn't VELVA CREAM Miss Desmond's perfect cure all?
ReplyDeleteI regret missing visiting hours for Margaret today but I've sent round a charming bouquet of flowers and some anti-ooze ointment.
Are you sure they have enough Coca-Cola there?
ReplyDeleteI'm being released tomorrow at 5 AM. Who's going to drive me home? BTW, I'm leaking fluid, will need frequent changing and crave KREML like crazy, plus have been locked out of my rented room above Hair 911. Perhaps I need a haircut, too, and am very itchy and crampy and coughing up puffy stuff sometimes. But don't want to be a bother. Hey, what's this? A rash? Will need to be carried, so please consider that, too. And Cookie, since you know about enemas, will most likely need help with that, too, thanks.
ReplyDeleteMargaret, did the Silk'n'Silver ingestion have anything to do with this? Can you balance it out with some Wella Kolestral?
ReplyDeleteDonna, it never occured to me that accidentally drinking Silk & Silver would land me in Hair 911 since most of my injuries were friction-related, but you could be right. Do you think I should mix Kolestral & Velva cream into a pasty mixture to spread liberally?
ReplyDelete